Funny how certain things in life we simply don’t seem to hear, isn’t it? I used to live on a fairly busy highway. Even though people suggested to me before I moved-in that the sound of the traffic would be noisy or busy or a bother, I didn’t care. I liked the house and actually enjoyed the moving traffic passing by. Yet, if I hear a chain saw or anything that sounds like it or a human voice–it’s a totally different story. It just is. I’d rather hear a pack of dogs bark all night long that this loud Indian couple bantering and fussing for hours on end! No really—they talk and talk and talk and then talk some more, non-stop hour after hour and on and on. How about reading a book or SOMETHING? Anything! (My current working theory is that it was a forced marriage and they are still hashing out whose fault it is–its just that the mind really wonders what they could go on about for so long and with such ….. well, lets leave it at that.)
I’m employing all types of tools and methods to deal with the stresses of certain sounds and noises these days. Take for instance the other night. Humor works and sometimes I can “crack myself up” as the saying goes!
The downstairs neighbors (a loud mouthed couple from India–pardon how I said that but it’s true) were getting louder as I was about to get into bed. Great! Here we go again! My tried-and-true method to muffle into silence their Mumbai-mumbling-mouths involves turning up the fan on the central air unit, then putting the floor fan on high, AND the air purifier too for the benefit of THAT white noise as well. All that, as sometimes happens, didn’t do it! I could still hear their very loud voices. The task of drowning out the sound of their mouths completely was going to require the calling forth of the duty of the dishwasher!
Once it’s all going at the same time, the place is really rocking with white noise. In fact, so much so that my apartment sounds like a jet engine! Rolling off on that thought, as I kicked off my slippers, turned back the covers on my bed, switched off the light announcing, “Ladies and gentleman this is your captain speaking, welcome to cosmic airlines, we’ve been cleared for take off, please fasten your seat belts, and enjoy your flight…” I felt asleep laughing. Humor helps dealing with stress.
(So does the fact that their VISA will run out soon and they will have to go back to India! Hasta la vista baby! Can’t happen too soon for me! Meanwhile… humor!) I know it’s NASCAR country here too and that Jimmy Johnson just won the Daytona 500, but I’ve developed a huge dis-taste for Lowe’s (employer of the Indians in this town). I am personally boycotting Lowe’s as a way to make myself feel better about the noise, not that I really ever shopped there anyway…but still. Opps… suddenly seem to have lost my sense of humor again! LOL Change! Grrrrrrrrr!! Or as my Buddhist friend has said, “Om Dammit OM!” (This blog is another tool in dealing with my stress as well. And yeah, yeah, I know it’s all illusion or mental projection or just life as it is in the big city. Still, I also know that a girl’s gotta’ do what a girl’s gotta’ do!)
PS — if some big exec at Lowe’s Headquarters reads my blog and wants to buy me out of my lease, you can contact me through my website. What are the chances? ha ha
Maybe it is a matter of merging and harmonizing—and not being/feeling/trying so hard to be separate. Maybe that’s the lesson from Lord and Lady Mouth of Mumbai! Okay, so I am being sarcastic and cynical and I shouldn’t call them that. You may want to cut me a break with that since I’ve been up until after 1 AM listening to their gyrations, door slamming and loud-mouthing! Yeah, I make myself stay up until they quiet down because IF NOT I have horrible dreams from their fighting and door slamming. Yeah, talk to the management? I have, they say call the police or slam the wall or stomp my feet and they will get the message.
It is about merging and harmonizing instead of fighting it! And them! And myself! At least I think that’s the approach. After all, what I’ve seen of India—aside from the ashram of the late Sathya Sai Baba—and PBS documentaries showing crowded streets and dog-eat-dog chaos amounts to a sum total of that and the movie, Slumdog Millionaire! Their way of life is probably 1,000 different than my own—they are obviously used to merging with others more than I am. With a population like that I’d suppose you’d have to know how –and I’d not be able to survive in India the way I’m not able to even merge or harmonize with my downstairs neighbors!
Many of us get this concept of India that everyone there is like Deepak Chopra or are meditation masters. I cannot tell you how many people from India that I’ve met who say they don’t even know how to meditate—so they’re just like Americans in that sense. I can’t lump the whole culture; that’s not fair and of course I’m blogging while sleep deprived here on top of being frustrated with the paper-thin walls here while now knowing that I’m hugely overpaying in rent for such a shoddily and cheaply constructed structure. But there it is—fact. It is what it is.
Some light here involves my soon to be married daughter who lives in suburbia in a beautiful community of condo—it’s gorgeous! In the summer time their pool is supervised and the last 10 minutes of every hour of the day they clear the kids from the pool so that adults can do lap swimming. YES!!!! She mentioned that when they buy their house in another year that they would … well, she’s going to talk it over with her soon to be husband, but she indicated that it’s possible that they could rent their condo to me!! I do miss the mountains and planned to go back – something more deeply affirmed within my since the super-mouths of Mumbia moved in below me. (If you’ve not been paying attention to my blog, they have earned that well-deserved name with me due to their 24-7 marathon dialogues interspersed with sudden fights that spring up just when you suspect they’ve finally fallen asleep throughout the wee early mornings!) They don’t leave for Monster’s Inc. (Lowes Headquarters) until around 9:30 AM but I’m up by 6 AM to welcome my granddaughter in while we wait together for the time for her school bus—her mother has a long drive to work and has to leave early.
Oh, why not put on a fan for white noise? Yeah? I hear them over the sound of the fan and if I fall asleep before they do (their fighting and loud voices beneath my bed can still be heard anyway), the result for is crazy, horrible dreams—nightmares. Bad dreams were coming every night (not typical for me AT ALL) until I woke straight up out of one and heard them fighting beneath me….duhh, no wonder! Honestly, these folks go on-and-on-and-on-and-on and never give it a rest! I’ve never heard anything like it and really if there was an award given for people who talk, bicker and fight non-stop—they’d be the clear winners!
I was feeling the FLIGHT OR FIGHT feeling in my bed while reading my spiritual book—that’s when they first moved in you see and I didn’t realize that there were new neighbors. Suddenly in the midst of my reading i feel that whole ‘fight or flight’ panic in my body. Really? where’s that coming from? I put my book down to go within to figure it out when i realize that i think i hear a voice, man’s voice. No I think, I must be imagining it. My fan is on, vibrating, making white noise. I go back to my book. Again, louder, voices…. still feeling my heart race and sort of panic feeling. What is going on here? so am I crazy? I get up to turn off the fan to find out and yeah! Its Lord and Lady Mumbi –the downstairs neighbors–going on and on yelling to each other beneath my bed!
Okay anyway, i’ve got one idea–it could help. I am going to get some inexpensive door mirrors at Wal Mart and put them mirror side down beneath my bed hoping that whatever energy comes up will be forced back down via the mirrors! I’ll let you know how it works. It won’t muffle sound but may direct energy back down so i don’t feel it in my body. In this instance of the Mumbai neighbors, the fact that I’m a sensitive, a psychic, is more a hindrance than a help.
Enough kvetching! The only thing I can do is try to harmonize instead of insisting that I maintain separation. I want to say this is MY sacred space and your voices and door slamming sounds are NOT ALLOWED—GET OUT@!! But, how realistic is that with these paper thin walls? Their voices just carry—they’re the opposite of ‘soft talkers’. I suspect one or both may be partially deaf –this I try to believe to evoke compassion for them which at 1 AM is really difficult, but I do try!
Anyway, one coping mechanism is to run the dishwasher through a few cycles; that muffles Mumbai for about an hour and a half. I put my TV onto the Buddhist channel the rest of the time in an effort to change the vibe –but really in the evenings my habit is to meditate or read; usually both. How long can I listen to the Dalai Lama’s translators or the sound of my own dishwasher before that gets old too? Well, there’s always old re-runs of Grey’s Anatomy or a Harry Potter DVD, but the point is that’s all me still trying to separate instead of merging and harmonizing.
Anyway, that’s my thought for today—it has to do with my observation that I am trying to separate myself from humanity and humanity is right underneath my feet letting me know it’s not going anywhere! Nice! And they say the universe has no sense of humor!
Part of this is not their fault! The shouting and slamming doors—yeah, I’m going to have to talk to them about that stuff that goes on after 10:00 PM; there’s no need for THAT! The other part of it is just them being them—humans! Humans’ way too close to my turf! Boy O boy do I miss the old tenant … a single guy who just played his TV … a movie every now and then. No problem; I’d go into the bedroom, turn on my fan and read my book. Sure. I’d hear him on the phone now and again but ‘what the heck’, a person has to talk once in a while. But these folks—OMG! It’s like a 24 hour phone call–!!
The weekend is upon us—and really I’d like to work more on writing my astrology class but why bang my head against the wall? It’s impossible to think straight with the motor-mouths of Mumbai going at it all day long! So, I’ll be coming up with a plan B today; maybe I can take my whole act over to my daughter’s house—she’s 5 doors down and hardly ever hears her neighbors.
Well, they don’t leave for Monster’s Inc for another 45 minutes. I’ve been totally killing time here waiting for them to leave for their jobs. I may go back to bed for a while which I really don’t like doing b but you won’t find THIS hard to believe—I’ve got a sore throat and head cold since yesterday afternoon. Yeah, figures.
See that photo of Mumbai? I nearly laughed out loud! Apparently, they’re used to living like that—and yeah, I’d never make it there OR I’d have to learn to merge and harmonize. Just look at the photo; that many people crowded together like that? They probably learned to shout to one another just to be heard over their neighbor!! They’re probably doing what is in entirely natural for them and I’m the one who has the problem!! I’m trying to see me from their point of view.
Could I be better at harmonizing and being more tolerant? Yeah, I really think I can and should try harder! Just look at that picture! I look at the birds outside my window taking turns to come to the birdfeeder… they sit on the branches waiting for some to clear out while others are there. Somehow they merge and harmonize and …. Well, some do flap their wings at the others, but still. I think that when the Mouths of Mumbai are home, I should be not home as much as possible. I should fly away like the birds to the birdfeeder. I’ve got to get better at harmonizing and merging with humanity; but I will still carry the Plan B to go back to the wilderness. I sure do miss the quiet and serenity of the mountains.
Merge, harmonize, blend and quit thinking that you are a separate ego Joy!!! You are only energy in the world like everyone and everything else. Lose your illusion of separateness and put the ego to bed, for good—merge, dissolve, blend, harmonize. Let go. Namaste Mumbi Mouth Lord and Lady, Namaste!
Excuse me now. I’m going to bed to nurse my cold and restore my health! It is 9:15 AM ; they should be soon leaving for Monster’s Inc. Please god, don’t tell me that they have the day off today!! I’m waiting to hear the door close…. waiting, waiting, waiting….. Oh, thank you jesus…9:20 AM and their door closes…they’ve gone…. AMEN.
Yeah, I’ll admit to being close to going over the edge…. but for now i’m going to grab my Kleenex and get back into bed!