I am thinking of my brother this morning and his very ill wife, hospitalized and last we heard not expected to remain on this plane much longer. My brother is very far away geographically and isn’t often in-touch but still—what can we do or say in this situation? Generally, what can we who are on the outside do in this type of situation?
I am not sure of the question and that’s really never good in divination methodology. I guess, thinking back to a moment ago, the question in mind just as I pulled the card is what advice could I give to my brother?
Can the Tarot Oracle help in some way when there is a loss of some type or in situations like with my brother, when someone is facing the eminent loss of a spouse?
It is not surprising at all that I drew the card of the 5 of Cups. Just look at the image above and how it relates to my brother who is facing some difficult days ahead with his wife in the hospital not expected to live much longer.
Let us find some wisdom here for him or for others who may have a similar situation of some type or who are dealing in any way with loss.
Blood is spilled on the table in the image and something cannot be reversed—once blood is spilled from the cup (in some tarot decks they say ‘milk’ instead of blood)… anyway, once it is spilled, it cannot go back into the cup. Here we can see the symbol-ogy of loss for sure and the man in the image is staring into nothingness, perhaps in shock and sadness.
We’ve all been in that state at one time or another in life and if you haven’t ‘been there, done that’, chances are it’s only a matter of time before you know exactly how that guy on the card is feeling.
It’s a shock and one needs sometimes that immobility and withdrawal to process what happened. I am thinking of an episode on Grey’s Anatomy (TV series) when Izzie laid on the bathroom floor in her gown for a good many hours processing the loss of the man who she saved medically and died suddenly from a complication from a heart transplant. He had just proposed to her and she’d accepted.
Life and death are part of life and while we celebrate births, we generally mourn death; yet, it is such a common experience to life—especially as we ourselves grow older. And while I don’t know if this would help my brother or not (believe it or not, I barely know him), maybe there can be some comfort found in knowing that these moments or loss are common and perhaps some solace can be found in knowing that what one feels is something that has commonly been felt by so many others who have experienced such similar losses. It may help to remember that in life we have common shared experiences. We may think that no one else could possibly understand how we feel – but others do. They had the courage to see things through and so will you—others understand and will help.
In my mind I am seeing a heart –shaped cup which has been broken. Cups in Tarot relate to the suit of hearts in regular playing cards and also to emotions. I think the important thing that this card reminds us of has to do with not feeling regret—this, indeed, is self-punishment at a time when the emotions are difficult enough. Do not blame yourself for there was nothing you could have done; when it is someone’s time, it is just as perfectly timed and divine and as it should be as when a flower opens and blooms. Birth and death alike happen in exact timing—or so goes my belief about it all.
If our birth chart is in perfect order (and I believe it is) then why should the time of death be any different? It is exactly as it should be. One of our greatest lessons in life is to accept what “is” and surrender to that–death is a teacher for us in that regard. “Grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change….” as the prayer goes.
Typically this card speaks these words, “a depressed man mourns the loss of something that was a great comfort”. I don’t think I could have pulled a more appropriate card considering the issue in mind when I did the shuffle. This man must remember that all is not lost and he must consider a decision about what to do next or where/how he would like his life to be now. All is not lost as there are still several cups still upright on the mantle nearby—that’s what those cups there mean; they represent rebounding after a difficult loss.
When we are grieving, it is hard to see those cups or to focus on asset or any advantages—that comes later, but it does come. The warning has to do with not overindulging in the grieving process but to rather re-evaluate life from the changed situation.
It takes great imagination if one isn’t customarily working in areas of the afterlife to imagine the loved on being happy, content, liberated and free. Humans are usually to focused on their own loss and imagine the loved one being as sorrowful as they are. I don’t know if my brother would be able to understand how relieved his wife will be to become liberated from her body which has become a difficulty for her spirit.
If he can remember that to some degree, then he can allow his own survival instincts to kick in and this will help to alleviate his grief. Eventually, he will focus on the gifts of life again rather than what has been lost—that’s what those two remaining cups are about. One affirmation that can eventually be used to help those who have suffered a great loss of any kind is this one: “From my loss I gain the experience to create a brighter tomorrow.” I know at the time the loss is new and fresh, this type of affirmation seems ridiculous, but healing will take place and there will be brighter tomorrows; you’ll see.
I love you brother! — and for casual readers of this blog, i hope there is something here for you to use somehow for yourself or with which to help others.