Dense Fog, All These Forms, Bodhisattva Practice 18

  FOGSometimes Life Itself is like this photo:  Dense Fog!  And we can’t quite see what’s around the curve of Life and let’s face it, life is curvy.  The guitar dude downstairs neighbor  may agree with that one based on his behavior this morning.  He’s slammed the door  beneath me four times and screamed from the area of the parking lot, “You’re f____ing kidding me!!”  All on an otherwise very quiet Sunday morning!  Chances are he’d agree that life is curvy right now! LOL

Cha- cha- cha- chaaa-changes!!  As for me, it’s a little bit foggy but I did see our new apartment yesterday, being able to look upstairs at what will be my monastic cell.  Could be worse.  Not sure how this is all going to go since now the move date is in question, at least my own half of it.  I may be looking at boxes for a month longer than I originally thought since the only girl left in the office (the other two quit) can’t get an answer from the big boss regarding my particular apartment’s lease.  Geesh!

I’m looking hither, thither and yon trying to determine how the furniture is going to be in my room and have fingers, toes, and everything crossed that they can get the horrid smell out of the place before we get in.  Previous tenants had some real issues!  Yuck.

Yeah, foggy.  I don’t know how long I’ll have to be there before another place opens and with each box I pack, I wonder if its contents should go to storage or the garage sale/Goodwill pile.  Ahh, but it could be so much worse indeed!  At least there is someplace to go besides the street with a shopping cart!  Actually, I’m sort of getting ‘into’ the fog lately finding the humor in it while I sing the Buddhist song about form, appearance and emptiness!  That’s a song of enlightenment and always calms me and soothes me and restores happiness [lyrics below].

Meanwhile, I know the sun will shine again and all will be temporarily organized again even though there’s chaos now.  Then we have the next move after this one to who knows where for certain;  although I have a pretty good idea (being psychic and all).

Empty forms like a rainbow with a shining glow!  —  I try to hum this tune as I load the boxes.

Better go feeD my daughter’s cats now!  Today’s my last day of cat duty–that drive down the Interstate is way too exciting for my taste but shouldn’t be bad today being that it’s Sunday.  Good excuse to get away from the wailing guitar guys anger as he gives me opportunities to practice patience over and over as he slams the door yet again!  Wow, bad morning dude?  

The wall shakes when the door slams…   more Bodhisattva practice for me!!  thanks dude! 

Oh yeah, the Buddhist song…. the words….

It goes like this:

All these forms, appearance emptiness

Like a rainbow with it’s shining glow

In the reaches of of appearance emptiness

Just let go and go where no mind goes

Every sound is sound and emptiness

Like the sound of an echo’s roll

In the reaches of sound and emptiness

Just let go and go where no mind goes

Every feeling is bliss and emptiness

Way beyond what words can show

In the reaches of bliss and emptiness

Just let go and go where no mind goes

All awareness, awareness emptiness

Way beyond what thoughts can know

In the reaches of awareness emptiness

Let awareness go, OH, where no mind goes!

Bodhisattva Practice #18 on Discouragement and Compassion  (from the 37 practices of a Bodhisattva):  “… without discouragement take on the misdeeds and pain of all living beings.”

Tonglen!

Back Peddling Lately? March Full Moon Madness and Holographic Double Desire

smelly catRevisiting that old black magic.  Vent.  Back to the future!  The now is fill with nausea–what? Yeah.  Predecessor stiff neck and migraine from (not heaven).  Well, what do you want?  Got a neighbor again and we share germs through the interconnected ventilation system but in all fairness germ sharing occurs at Wal Mart and the woman’s locker room at the Y too.   So, oh you know that post from last week that about guitar man and his singing?  Well, the dude just raised the sound like by like double the 1, 000 decibels.  Ever see Phoebe from that old TV series, “Friends”-?  Remember how she couldn’t carry a tune? Well, meet her song sibling:  my downstairs neighbor!  Toss in 2 days of solid cold non-stop rain, mixed with headache/nausea laced with the the singer of “smelly cat”‘s sound soul brother and, it was the weekend from not heaven!

Maybe I’m at fault?  I did mention in my litany of gratitude to the rental office gal what a nice new neighbor they found for me and how I didn’t mind his guitar–that was before he started to sing out with it and the whole strumming decibel upsurge. Trying to be optimistically positive, the recollection of saying that I sort of enjoyed his guitar came back to haunt me numerous times over the weekend.  Really Joy? What WERE you thinking?  

Maybe she told him I was a fan! NOT!  it’s just that it’s the same song over and over and over again–Dude!  do you even know a happy tune?  Or any other song at all?

You ever been to Disney’s Magic Kingdom Country Bear Jamboree?  Yeah, that’s what I’m talking about–this guy is definitely Country Bear material.  Okay, okay; that wasn’t very nice–I’ll admit it.  That was me venting my frustration.  I can only write this now because the guy is off somewhere; otherwise, i’d not be able to think straight like yesterday and Saturday.  I suppose if a person’s going to be down with some sort of ‘whatever this IS’–headache and tummy troubles–may as well have it be on a weekend when its raining and the dude is singing like (not heaven).

I’m not going to go into the talking that I hear at 3 AM… I’d really like to pretend that’s not happening.  Back to the future; I feel like I’m back peddling under water.  I thought that I was finished with neighbor issues.  The universe is testing me–one more time, encore!

Before the weekend of guitar accompanied wailing I saw the guy out in the parking lot. He was sitting in his car in front of the building.  I waved.  He looked right through me.  Am I ghost?  Awkward.  Whatever dude; just trying to be friendly.  Then passed by the 2nd time on my way back from my daughters.  Waved again.  Still no response.  Maybe he has vision problems or maybe I’m really dead and don’t know it yet.  That part doesn’t bother me.  The wailing does.

Smelly cat oh smelly cat….  i don’t swim in your living room, don’t wail in mine@!  (a little light strummen’ and small soft hummen’ maybe, okay,  but…  turn down the volume dude!)  And if they turned this building into a recording studio since last week–I didn’t get the memo on that!   

Blogging is healing.  And so are very kind daughters; one was going to take off work to drive over an hour to take me to the doctor appointment that the other daughter made.  No Way I say!  They are remembering the emergency room flu episode on New Years Day–we’are all still mildly traumatized by that one.   What else do you need she says?  She’s picking me up ginger ale and crackers at the store as I type.  I take care of my body–eat well, take vitamins so I don’t get this being whole germ-a-thing since I’ve moved down here.  Ahhhh, Life… smelly cat oh smelly cat….  THIS TOO SHALL PASS I hear my mother (dead these many years) say this!  (I’m a psychic medium after all–besides, I know when I hear my very own mother) … anyway, I consider this as well as  all the advice a friend and my daughters have given me about how I should speak with the dude downstairs.

‘Ain’t nobody got time for that’ another part of me says.  I got to get back to transitioning my website!  When I think about work:  I feel better.

Like I said, blogging is healing. I am reading The Atopia Chronicles by Matthew Mather who resides nearby actually–not certain I understand it all yet… but in this sci-fi futuristic fiction, there are these holographic doubles who can take on some of the undesirable part of your life for you.  They can ramp up or scale down any undesirable energy around you–such as eliminating anything you don’t like so it is not in your awareness!  I could use one of those right about now!

holographic doubleAgain, blogging is healing. And now, back to LIFE nausea or not! And yeah, I see myself knocking on his door talking about all this soon!  My Libra says NO, PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME DO THAT and my Aries says… well, never mind.  Maybe after all the Full Moon energy has weakened a bit more. I want to be in the pool swimming; normally that’s where I’d be right now.

Yeah, i think ginger ale and crackers are going to help.  Really–I have such kind and caring daughters!  Thank you God!   Yet, I still wish I had a holographic double who could deal with all this and make the rest go away–unless I  ACTUALLY AM (Yikes!) the holographic double!?  Geesh, too much sci-fi lately?  ya’ think?  Well, maybe not… need to talk to my spirit guides about all this!  

Speaking of revisiting old black magic–turns out the prescription for nausea given for the January flu was able to be filled here in March.  My daughter picked it up for me–that and a few other supplies, sparing me from a nauseous trip out in the cold, cold rain.  She was like my holographic double today in that sense.  Bless her heart; do you know that those 12 pills cost $58–??   I’d have never given her the prescription paper if I’d known that’d cost that much!  Did I mention what good daughters I have?  

This day totally feels like back to the future with some kind of flu and neighbor issue–AGAIN.  Mom, you sure?  It will pass she says again, it will pass.  

Okay.  I’m naming this blog post March Full Moon Madness because it is and I am…. daydreaming about a holographic double to do my dirty work!  Pffffsssssttt!