How the gym at the Y is like a past life monastery and a psychic on the spiritual path

gym-pool collage

I don’t need to try to convince you.  It wouldn’t do a bit of good in the least anyway. Some things you know, that’s all.  And it’s not because my work is doing psychic readings—everybody has things they know but can’t prove.  Past lives can be like that. Of course there’s also wishful thinking and self-delusion that has to be ruled out but like I said, if you know you know.

Its that way for me and Tibet and also the monastic way of life–feel certain I was a lowly and not very evolved monk once.
Still am in many ways I think; yet the monk thing is the topic for this post.

And the gym at the Y too.  I’ve been a swimmer there for a year and just in the past month have felt the attraction to climb the stairs to the upper level–the location of the gym.  (Maybe the intuition guided me there, knowing before the mundane mind did that I was going to need some muscles to lift and move boxes.)  Anyway…

I love it up there nearly as much as I love the pool, but no, the pool is my first love.  Yet, the gym reminds me so much of my lifetime as a monk in a monastery.  How’s that?  Well, it’s like this…

Every body, including the body of this self, has these ear-buds in the ears listening to their favorite music–or at least that’s what I’m doing.  (Michael Jackson’s song and his music is the muse for me.)   Nonetheless, whatever they are listening to, they all have earbuds in and they are all focused inward!  Yet together in the same place walking by one another, barely nodding, aware of others to a minimal extent and focused inward maximally.

Wow!  Respect, consideration, harmony but most everyone not plugged into anything but the inner self, the workout plan and their own body.  Love that!  Just really dig (to use an old hippie term) all that inward-ness aligned with the body and music.

Totally makes me think of a different lifetime in which I danced ballet in Russia–my parents pushed me and I had to dance but used it mostly to escape my body and my life.  It’s very similar to what I do now especially on the treadmill.  The machines do require a bit more focus and presence–but it’s still all inward.

I miss the Y but realize I’m getting attached to going—and we know that’s NEVER a good thing.  I have clients today and am using it as a rest day anyway since I did a lot of moving boxes into storage units and helping my sister pack, stack boxes and clean her carpet over the weekend too.

Balance in all things–that’s probably something learned in that ballet dancing lifetime in Russia.  I wonder if most of those peeps in the gym would relate their work outs on the machines and lifting weights as a type of meditation.  If they thought about it at all, I’m sure they would.

PS — i love the weight assisted chin up machine the best.  I’m lifting more of my own body weight than I did at the start.  I love the progress I see and of course the whole meditative experience of it and being with others sure does make me think of my days at the monastery — everybody in their own world then too, but in a whole different way!

Tomorrow I swim!  Wasn’t I a dolphin once? 

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Impressions, Imprints, Cyber-footprints in SAMSARA

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SAMSARA and IMPERMANENCE

Impressions!  Imprints!  Cyber-footprints!

I don’t think about that often enough.  Or so I recently realized!  I tend to work through my rough days on my blog, hoping that as I do so that a reader out there somewhere may be helped through the insight that I, myself, seek.    But before going further, there must be an understanding conveyed.  One that I don’t convey as often as I should; one that should go without saying but that I forget to say–perhaps even forget to say to myself!  But look, it’s not easy to stay awake sometimes!  Life is full of … well, the most efficient way to say it is through one word SAMSARA.

Let me get an official Buddhist definition of that word [SAMSARA] and this from Wikapedia seems as good as any others from Google:  Saṃsāra (Sanskrit, Pali; also samsara) is a Buddhist term that literally means “continuous movement” and is commonly translated as “cyclic existence”, “cycle of existence”, etc. Within Buddhism, samsara is defined as the continual repetitive cycle of birth and death that arises from ordinary beings’ grasping and fixating on a self and experiences. Specifically, samsara refers to the process of cycling through one rebirth after another within the six realms of existence where each realm can be understood as either a physical realm or a psychological state characterized by a particular type of suffering. Samsara arises out of avidya (ignorance) and is characterized by dukkha (suffering, anxiety, dissatisfaction). In the Buddhist view, liberation from samsara is possible by following the Buddhist path.

I use divination to help me find peace because the process of  looking for insight puts one in the mental framework wherein one shifts or better said begins to detach from the mental affliction long enough to look for insight. [My profession involves divination after all; its a habit.  LOL.]

I’ve been conversing through private text on my Facebook account with a blog follower who summarized the last few years of my life in a few lines that made me startle a bit, thinking ‘Man o man, my life really sucks!”   But of course it doesn’t, and it is full of just as many ups, downs, attractions and aversions as anyone else’s here in Samsara!  No better or no worse, at least potentially, as anyone else’s life who is aware of their mind where it is all located anyway!

Here’s the last bit I wrote this morning, sharing a paragraph from the communication that I’ve been having with a reader:

I think one comfort is that we are never alone in what we experience since the human condition seems very universal… in that no matter what kind of dilemma one is in, one can always find so many others going through the same illusion or experiencing the same dream (or nightmare); so that on some level there is comfort when we can do as the Buddhists do which is Tonglen … basically to say, ” May all of us, may we join together , all of us, and may I be the one to gather it all up here, now;  and then may we all be free of our delusion and wake from the dream and be liberated! And how does the liberation happen”?

What kind of  liberation? Mental–for that is how it all occurs anyway, in the mind.  So, to look at life and hear, see, experience it without aversion or attachment, either one… to just say “Oh, now it is this and now it is that or now it is ‘not’  this and now it is ‘not’  that… hmmmm… okay… and that’s how it is or isn’t…. and now I notice that there is a regret thought, or a memory thought, or a judgment thought, or a happy thought, or a silly thought, or a sad thought, or whatever it is.”   Just looking at the mind.  Well, that’s pretty simplistic  sounding, but most Buddhist teachings are and that’s why I, for one,  like them. LOL I may blog this. Don’t be surprised if you see this text again!

Some  last thoughts:  IMPERMANENCE!  This is a good one to reflect upon too.  That helps put it all in perspective as well… the Buddhist perspective of the “precious human life.”   I have to often remind myself not to become caught up in self-cherishing; this, too, being the source of difficulty and suffering.  And then if all else fails, I hit the pool and go swimming to focus on my kick, stroke and lap times while everything else falls away!

This, That and Tonglin, a Buddhist Meditation Practice

lotus imageૐ  Just a bit of comings and goings in this blog post….

ૐ  trees are really coming out with their leaves here now and i can barely see the houses beyond…

ૐ  hostas are coming right up and hydrangeas are starting off well too…

ૐ got newsletter out on time this week; an accomplishment worth mentioning since I’ve been late too often in recent months…

ૐ   fed my daughter’s cat and fish and took my niece to counseling session…  it is good to be ‘of service’ to others

ૐ  the new apartment that my sister and I are renting in a month or so is getting new carpeting and appliances; I could see the guys working on that unit today and removing the old stove and refrig…

ૐ   we will have all new appliances and upgrades….

ૐ a blue jay sitting on the balcony railing looks at me before flying up to the bird feeder, then spreads his blue wings and majestically flies away and there’s god in that moment just now

ૐ   paused the packing yesterday for my swim, accomplishing the 66 lap mile and enjoying every lap!

ૐ  It’s a little above 60 degrees today but its going down to 32/freezing degrees tonight they say; a mixture of spring and winter….

ૐ   i plan to sort through clothes and utility and clothes closets soon… my daughter brought more boxes last night for me… need to pick out a date for a garage sale….

ૐ   daughter’s fish seems depressed or is that a projection?  no@!

ૐ   I may mix up a salad and settle for that for dinner.

ૐ  I could be writing a new country song, “My life is going back in storage, yes again.”

ૐ   Maybe before the year is out my name will come to the top of the waiting list for my own apartment in a more desirable place — or maybe my move-in with my sister will be permanent, eventually at a new location?

ૐ  These things are being worked out somewhere else right now… and i don’t feel fully part of that divine conversation yet.  Maybe I don’t want to be, to know.

ૐ   Not sure about a lot right now. but letting that be okay.

ૐ   Its Holy Thursday and tomorrow is Good Friday–so says my old catholic programming.

ૐ   One of my daughters reported the deaths of two people she knows from work; i always feel such compassion for those left behind.  My heart goes there, knowing the soul crossed over is alright, always.

ૐ  I feel a very long meditation is in order right now, doing the Buddhist Tonglin practice that i feel called to do; with this grand cross and eclipse energy, i know that there are those who could use extra good vibes…

ૐ  …feeling as if the elders are asking for my participation with this Tonglin meditation now especially for the souls of the loved ones left behind.

ૐ  So i will find a place where the Sun shines through my window and comply as soon as i hit the “publish” button here.

Some of you may not know about Tonglin.  So here’s a video of a Tonglin medition with the Buddhist nun, Pema Chodron … if you consider yourself a lightworker or world server, you may like to listen through the 4 minutes of how to do this meditation.  Won’t you join me?

What do you need to survive? Venus in Pisces conjunct Neptune–the need for water

WATER FROM WELLSome say life is a constant struggle to better our chances for survival. That its a law just like birth and death. I’m not sure I’d use the word struggle but I do see some truth in that.

I’ve seen people who have so much want more; and in some ways (it’s all relative, I suppose) that’s me too. I think the word survival may be defined differently by each person.  What do we need to survive?

Our water went out last night and everybody in town is having to boil water today. There’s a survival need if there was one–sort of like that book,  CYBER STORM, that is going to be a movie.  In that scenario there was snow to melt.

Two ladies at the pool today said that they also had a boil water warning but not from the water main break.  Rather it was because someone stole the computer that regulated the pressure and water levels in the well that a number of people rely on.

What’s with the water situation lately?  Venus moved into Pisces a few days ago; shall we point the finger there?  Pisces, after all, is a water sign and Venus is getting pretty cozy (within 3 degrees of orb) with Neptune, the ruler of Pisces itself.  Venus, it is said, regulates recognition of our personal needs and desires.  Who said?  my astrology teacher.  Anyway…

To survive:  to persist, to succeed, to outlive an event, to go on and to outlive the problem or issue at hand.  What’s the problem or issue at hand?  Life Itself?  Is Life a problem to survive?

How do we better our chances of survival? (or better our chances to flourish)?   I think that’s what motivates many people each day.  What do you think?

Most people want to flourish and others are happy to survive; and then there are those that define surviving in terms of flourishing.  Just sayen’–or rather asking, as a contemplation, a meditation.

We need water to survive because we depend on it to keep our bodies hydrated. Our bodies are made up of between 50% to 70% of water and amazingly our brains comprise over 80% water. It is therefore obvious that we need to take water to keep our bodies functioning. We can only live several days without it; if lucky, up to 5 days if you’re in good shape–or so they say. 

 

Crystal Divination – Hematite for grounding into the body, making peace with it

Image HemititeImage HemititeI got to thinking today about all of us on Earth here in a body and specifically about how it is when the body simply can’t do what you’d like it to anymore or at any time really if it’s temporary.  Forgive me; it’s just that  I saw a picture of my X-husband today and it sort of freaked me out.  Am I going to look like that in 11 years?  (He’s got 11 years on me.)

I wanted to swim today and (due to some type of body betrayal–the flu? what is it? cleansing? clearing?) turns out it was a no-swim day.  Oh, how I wish that I had a pool of my very own in my very own yard that could be used when and however; but alas, it’s the YMCA for me!  Oh, please. Don’t misunderstand, I’m so grateful.  The thing I’m writing about is my thought of inclusion, everyone, the Buddhist prayer that starts with, “May all beings be …. ” and then usually we hear happy or free of suffering after that.

Whatever the experience is for me, there’s never a feeling of being alone with it because there is a global understanding that there are others who also have this same frustration, worry or suffering just like me.  Of course, then there’s a feeling immediately like “Oh, yes, let me help those over there…” which prompts my own internal mantra that goes something like, “may all those who are not able to do what they would like to do right now feel the love and support of Life… and so on”.

Yeah, sometimes it is disappointing–Life.  But there always others who suffer equally or worse and we think of them and we become liberated ourselves.

I feel like drawing a card… doing a divination… about this.  No, let me draw a crystal.  Which stone can help us when we feel frustrated because our body won’t do what we’d like it to do.  Oh, well look here!  I drew Hematite out of the bowl.  Good ole’ Hematite… for grounding!   And Hematite helps you to sort thing out in your mind.

I’ve heard it told that if someone has a fever, you can place hematite on the head to cool the body, draw out the heat.  Personally, I’ve never tried that.

Hematite facilitates the attainment of peace and inner-happiness–that’s what my crystal book says and that sounds good.

Hematite kind of helps you to ground in the body and be okay with it — in whatever state it’s in.  Hematite is also thought to support your goals and intentions.

Personally, this stone has always made me think of water… but then today, everything seems to do that.  I can’t help it that when this body hits the water and begins the swim that I feel like an eagle in the sky!

(I know how that feels; I drank eagle essence once.  Don’t ask.)

Maybe I can swim tomorrow.

Meanwhile, may we all ground into our physical bodies (no matter the condition) and make peace with it… and may all beings without exception experience happiness and the causes for happiness and may that expand in their experience.

Crystal Divination – Botswana Agate for focus on detail and toxin release

Botswana Agate collageBotswana Agate!  I drew a stone today as part of a divination exercise for my life.

This particular stone is known for its ability to energize the auric bodies and helps the body rid itself of toxins.

It is said to be able to counteract poison no matter if those happen on the physical, emotional or intellectual level.

I find this divination right on–in view of my recent (and still a bit current) physical symptoms of headache, body ache and nausea.  Some sort of toxin sounds pretty plausible to me.

Living alone in the mountains for 15 years not exposed to humans or places living in or around many humans habitats, it’s not all that far fetched that my immune and nervous system is still trying to adjust to living in so-called civilization now.

Quiet mountain seclusion meets big city and when they mix… toxic?!

Anyway, the Botswana Agate… this stone also has qualities of energy which aid a person to concentrate and focus; that’s good because for my next trick I’m going back to work on the new, soon to be website.  I like the waves in this stone; makes me think of swimming!  The water!  I do miss the water right now.  We swam before we talked and before we walked and breathed but we forgot!

Anyway, all agate stones (and there are many varieties) are believed to generally balance the emotional, physical and intellectual bodies.  I think of all agates as good stones to have around when one is doing any kind of writing.

Anyway, this stone helps one when paying attention to details is a must!  Oh and it’s usually purple and gray.  By the way, psychics do readings for themselves all the time and this has just been one for myself.  I asked why I’m dealing with these certain physical symptoms right now (headache, nausea).  I’m going to put this stone in my little pouch and wear it around my neck for the rest of the day.  No more eating out for a while, and I’m going to wash off my veggies and fruits better–just in case.  For now, going to get more water–whatever the toxin is, I’m trying to drown it! LOL

Back Peddling Lately? March Full Moon Madness and Holographic Double Desire

smelly catRevisiting that old black magic.  Vent.  Back to the future!  The now is fill with nausea–what? Yeah.  Predecessor stiff neck and migraine from (not heaven).  Well, what do you want?  Got a neighbor again and we share germs through the interconnected ventilation system but in all fairness germ sharing occurs at Wal Mart and the woman’s locker room at the Y too.   So, oh you know that post from last week that about guitar man and his singing?  Well, the dude just raised the sound like by like double the 1, 000 decibels.  Ever see Phoebe from that old TV series, “Friends”-?  Remember how she couldn’t carry a tune? Well, meet her song sibling:  my downstairs neighbor!  Toss in 2 days of solid cold non-stop rain, mixed with headache/nausea laced with the the singer of “smelly cat”‘s sound soul brother and, it was the weekend from not heaven!

Maybe I’m at fault?  I did mention in my litany of gratitude to the rental office gal what a nice new neighbor they found for me and how I didn’t mind his guitar–that was before he started to sing out with it and the whole strumming decibel upsurge. Trying to be optimistically positive, the recollection of saying that I sort of enjoyed his guitar came back to haunt me numerous times over the weekend.  Really Joy? What WERE you thinking?  

Maybe she told him I was a fan! NOT!  it’s just that it’s the same song over and over and over again–Dude!  do you even know a happy tune?  Or any other song at all?

You ever been to Disney’s Magic Kingdom Country Bear Jamboree?  Yeah, that’s what I’m talking about–this guy is definitely Country Bear material.  Okay, okay; that wasn’t very nice–I’ll admit it.  That was me venting my frustration.  I can only write this now because the guy is off somewhere; otherwise, i’d not be able to think straight like yesterday and Saturday.  I suppose if a person’s going to be down with some sort of ‘whatever this IS’–headache and tummy troubles–may as well have it be on a weekend when its raining and the dude is singing like (not heaven).

I’m not going to go into the talking that I hear at 3 AM… I’d really like to pretend that’s not happening.  Back to the future; I feel like I’m back peddling under water.  I thought that I was finished with neighbor issues.  The universe is testing me–one more time, encore!

Before the weekend of guitar accompanied wailing I saw the guy out in the parking lot. He was sitting in his car in front of the building.  I waved.  He looked right through me.  Am I ghost?  Awkward.  Whatever dude; just trying to be friendly.  Then passed by the 2nd time on my way back from my daughters.  Waved again.  Still no response.  Maybe he has vision problems or maybe I’m really dead and don’t know it yet.  That part doesn’t bother me.  The wailing does.

Smelly cat oh smelly cat….  i don’t swim in your living room, don’t wail in mine@!  (a little light strummen’ and small soft hummen’ maybe, okay,  but…  turn down the volume dude!)  And if they turned this building into a recording studio since last week–I didn’t get the memo on that!   

Blogging is healing.  And so are very kind daughters; one was going to take off work to drive over an hour to take me to the doctor appointment that the other daughter made.  No Way I say!  They are remembering the emergency room flu episode on New Years Day–we’are all still mildly traumatized by that one.   What else do you need she says?  She’s picking me up ginger ale and crackers at the store as I type.  I take care of my body–eat well, take vitamins so I don’t get this being whole germ-a-thing since I’ve moved down here.  Ahhhh, Life… smelly cat oh smelly cat….  THIS TOO SHALL PASS I hear my mother (dead these many years) say this!  (I’m a psychic medium after all–besides, I know when I hear my very own mother) … anyway, I consider this as well as  all the advice a friend and my daughters have given me about how I should speak with the dude downstairs.

‘Ain’t nobody got time for that’ another part of me says.  I got to get back to transitioning my website!  When I think about work:  I feel better.

Like I said, blogging is healing. I am reading The Atopia Chronicles by Matthew Mather who resides nearby actually–not certain I understand it all yet… but in this sci-fi futuristic fiction, there are these holographic doubles who can take on some of the undesirable part of your life for you.  They can ramp up or scale down any undesirable energy around you–such as eliminating anything you don’t like so it is not in your awareness!  I could use one of those right about now!

holographic doubleAgain, blogging is healing. And now, back to LIFE nausea or not! And yeah, I see myself knocking on his door talking about all this soon!  My Libra says NO, PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME DO THAT and my Aries says… well, never mind.  Maybe after all the Full Moon energy has weakened a bit more. I want to be in the pool swimming; normally that’s where I’d be right now.

Yeah, i think ginger ale and crackers are going to help.  Really–I have such kind and caring daughters!  Thank you God!   Yet, I still wish I had a holographic double who could deal with all this and make the rest go away–unless I  ACTUALLY AM (Yikes!) the holographic double!?  Geesh, too much sci-fi lately?  ya’ think?  Well, maybe not… need to talk to my spirit guides about all this!  

Speaking of revisiting old black magic–turns out the prescription for nausea given for the January flu was able to be filled here in March.  My daughter picked it up for me–that and a few other supplies, sparing me from a nauseous trip out in the cold, cold rain.  She was like my holographic double today in that sense.  Bless her heart; do you know that those 12 pills cost $58–??   I’d have never given her the prescription paper if I’d known that’d cost that much!  Did I mention what good daughters I have?  

This day totally feels like back to the future with some kind of flu and neighbor issue–AGAIN.  Mom, you sure?  It will pass she says again, it will pass.  

Okay.  I’m naming this blog post March Full Moon Madness because it is and I am…. daydreaming about a holographic double to do my dirty work!  Pffffsssssttt!  

Separating Self from Race Consciousness, a Meditation on Happiness

guitar in water imageI hope the guy downstairs doesn’t read my blog–chances are he doesn’t.  He sings you see.  And apparently he loves it because he does it often with his guitar accompaniment.  I love swimming and do that regularly too.  We both have a passion.  I don’t swim very well if I compare myself to many of the other swimmers–especially the triathlete types but I can’t not swim anymore than the guy downstairs can ‘not’ sing and play his guitar.

When you enjoy doing something, you simply must do it or unhappiness sets in.  I’m happy after my swim and I’d bet if we asked the guy downstairs that he’d say he’s happy when he sings and even when he isn’t singing, the song sustains him like my swim sustains me in between workouts.

Sometimes you do things simply for the joy of it and you don’t necessarily want to make a career of it.  Sometimes you ‘do’ make a career of it–some do, some don’t.  Everybody’s motivation is different.

I’m not trying to enter a triathlon and if you saw me in my bathing suit you’d see how far from that I was  anyway; it’s not my goal.  My goal for swimming is different than the guy in the next lane over–it’s an exercise in mindfulness for one thing.  Oh, there are other reasons why I swim too—I really love the water.

It separates me from race consciousness–from society, from the 3rd dimensional world.  Why? Its a present moment, time-altering thing.  Its my own path, my own inner truth.

Swim your swim, sing your song—

“Sing, sing your song and don’t worry if it’s not good enough for anyone else to hear, just sing.  Sing your song!”  Or swim your swim!  Got to go now, the pool is calling to me and I’m missing the water!