And it started out to be such a nice day! I’m not a fighter—trust me. I’d rather let the world have its way and go peacefully to the top of the mountain and be alone in a cold, wet, damp cave than to fight. Wait. That’s where I’ve been and I didn’t like that cold, damp cave but on days like today I miss it. Well, okay. Let me not exaggerate; it hasn’t been the whole day after all.
But generally speaking over the past few months, not just once but a number of times I’ve been challenged to fight. Yeah, put up your dukes! Let’s have it out.
It’s just not me; not my style but when you’re boxed into a corner you sort of have to! Know what I mean? In order to have peace do you have to fight for it? Wait. I need to give that some thought. I don’t believe in war—globally, nationally, or in my own life spectrum.
Do I have to fight to survive? Do I have to fight to have peace?
Who is the I who does these things and has these challenges? And where is this “I”?
The one who is now typing on the keyboard? Yeah, she backed down from speaking up again and is not happy about it because she feels whipped because of it. She lost again….and did not gain peace. Not at all and that’s the kicker in all this@!
If she backed down and felt peaceful about it… that would be fine and dandy. But she just ends up feeling more ticked off than if she’d rolled up her sleeves, put up her dukes and had it out! But haven been there and done that (she tried it), that makes it even worse! She was physically (and metaphysically) sick for days after that episode!
What if you can’t run to a dark, damp and cold cave to escape? And what if you feel worse when you put up your dukes? I guess you’re left feeling whooped, beaten up and exasperated.
I suppose it’s the least of all evils…..
1) either jump in with both feet and have it out and suffer the result of depleting your energy totally and practically puking all the way
2) Feel ticked off and exasperated and disappointed in the self because you backed down… again@!
3) Be with it, rock with it, roll with it, and hope that the time between challenges lengthens and the rest of the time go to the peaceful place within, letting it all go. Even when you’re backed into the corner? It’s the least of all evils—deal with it.
And then open up the laptop and type about it into this blog…. Release, release, release.
What can I say? I have Mercury square Pluto in my chart and that’s how we with that aspect do it. Excuse me while I go check my transits to see how long this bologna is going to last!
And I go mumbling how I vow not to be pulled into anymore dramas…. Corner or no corner, Hell No I Won’t Go! It’s a good thing Mercury was on my Saturn today is all I can say!
Tomorrow will be a better day! Two lousy hours of a day do not make it all. If we do this by averages, it’s a very small one out of 24 hours. LOL
PS — I’ll be working on some kind of plan B you can be sure! I just need to change my mind. I will not go to war. Go to War in order to have Peace? That’s an oxymoron. I’ll get back to you… I’m going to check my transits and then inquire within!