What do you do when people change? Where do you find true unchanging happiness? Relationships, Drugs, and Tarot Ten of Cups

There’s no personal question today… nothing troubling the mind or heart but let me pretend that the person reading this today is troubled by a relationship problem.  It’s possible with the FULL MOON in the astrological relationship sign of LIBRA now.

Let’s say it has to do with people changing and we could pretend that the reader feels that the person they are closest to in life is turning, changing, becoming different and isn’t sure what’s going on and is troubled by the change.  Let’s ask the divination tool, the Tarot, the oracle used today in this post what advice should be given to such a person who is troubled by their loved one’s apparent change.

I’m going to shuffle the cards now.  Here we go…

Oh, good card I think!  We have the 10 of cups and there look at the image at the top of this post—good image isn’t it?  I mean, considering our question.  She’s looking down and he seems to be trying to look into her eyes to figure her out.  The rainbow above and cups with it represent emotional happiness perhaps and how she once was but currently there’s a different look than appears on the woman sitting on the rainbow.

Makes me think (before we go any further) about those who seem to need to figure other people out in the first place!  I mean, why can’t we tell him to get out of her face and leave her alone and find something better to do?  Well, anyway…

Let’s look at the 10 of cups and remember that this card – in archetypical terms – represents emotional happiness.  O, how fleeting that can be sometimes and how traumatic when we believe that we have lost the source of it which is (of course) impossible to do, but still…. There we are anyway.

It also makes me think about co-dependency.  You know what that is right?  I can’t be happy until I know you are okay and happy first.  That’s an example of co-dependency.  I know that one pretty well because this is how I was experiencing my middle child back when she was in high school and if I’m honest I still get this way sometimes and she’s now 34 years old!  But this isn’t about her and I… this is a general question about what to do when people change.

The Oracle (via the card) seems to want to specifically address the change having to do with changes in emotional happiness—or maybe that’s my own interpretation.  Anyway…

It’s definitely about emotions according to the Oracle.  Cups is the symbol representing emotions in the Tarot system.  My Herbal Tarot deck wants to associate this card with the “herb” cannabis sativa otherwise known as marijuana.  Passing illusions!  That’s what that rainbow on this card represents.  I’ve never liked drugs, alcohol or even excessive herbs because I’m already pretty Neptune-ish and have a difficult enough time keeping my feet on the ground!  I’m learning to master my mind and emotions and that’s a bit harder to do when under the influence.  LOL

The 10 of Cups card is about learning equilibrium and that comes through lessons many times that are given via others which brings us back to the main issue we’re talking about.  Can you remain balanced when others around you are not?  OR are you co-dependent?

When we get caught up in the pie-in-the-sky syndrome and believe that everyone should maintain a basic sense of equilibrium for our benefit so that ‘we’ can be okay, that’s quite a delusion to maintain.  People will change and we will as well.  That last statement really makes me think about how we find one moment of exquisite pleasure and peace in which no problems seem to be on any horizon and we feel happy and then we spend our life chasing that moment.  This, I believe, is what causes people to turn to marijuana, alcohol and/or other drugs—they are seeking to reproduce that carefree state albeit in an artificial way.  Joyful intoxication can be used as an exercise to learn to discriminate the true inner reality from outer delusions!  I can see that as the only benefit.

If you become troubled by a loved one who seems to have changed, examine your own tendency to be co-dependent and remember that all things will eventually pass—both peaks and valleys of happiness and sadness.  Find the unchanging core within you that is stable and maintains equilibrium despite changes in the life around you or in the people around you.  All happiness comes from within the mind and heart of full self-realization and no amount of drugs or alcohol or herbs will help you find it on a permanent basis.  Only YOU can create the non-changing stable, happy contentment that you are seeking in the outer world.  To help others who do not realize this yet, you can only show the best example and detach.

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